Rob-Feinsteins-IM-Chat

As you all know, last year ROH head honcho Rob Feinstein was caught in an underground sting operation last year that truly embarrassed himself, his company, and the entire wrestling business. Members of a website called pervertedjustice.com pretended to be a 14-year-old boy and did a sickening instant message chat with Rob, which eventually resulted in Rob driving to the guy's "house," where he was immediately greeted by video cameras and news crews. Feinstein, totally embarrassed, covered his face and ran back to his car ~~like a little b*tch~~ in fear of what this might do to his reputation and his business.

Longtime visitors of this site are well aware of our views on Rob Feinstein. He wimped out of a Pick My Brain interview with us after he saw our questions, after initially agreeing to do it.

When Feinstein was caught red-handed, did we gloat? Nope. We figured nothing we could do would ever embarrass him more than what he had just went through, so we kept a low profile. A golden opportunity, and we behaved like perfect gentlemen.

But, to no one's surprise, Rob Feinstein is at it again. You'd think he learned his lesson, but in wrestling, learning from lessons doesn't exist. Feinstein, under his new screen name of FeinsteinIsaWuss, recently had an instant messaging chat session by an obviously annoyed Gabe Sapolsky, ROH's current booker. Thanks to Gabe, we now have a transcript of this yet-another-disgusting display of abnormal behavior on the part of Mr. Feinstein. Please, if you're easily offended or disturbed, don't read this. You've been warned.

Disclaimer: The below dialogue is a parody. That seems obvious to anyone with a brain, but since some mentally challenged folks out there might actually believe it was real, so we had to point out the obvious.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hey.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: HEY!

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Who's this.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Me.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Rob.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: As in Feinstein.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hello?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Yeah, what.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: What's up?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What do you mean what's up. We hate each other. You embarrassed me and everyone with ROH. Don't act like nothing.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Dude that's in the past.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I've changed.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: I can't forgive and forget. You can't ever recover from something like that.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Why not. Pat Patterson & Terry Garvin did.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: I don't have time for this. Leave me alone.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Come on! I promise I'm a changed man.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I've gotten help. Therapy, 3 times a week.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Cost me a fortune.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: So you're straight now?

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hell no, they're not miracle workers. But I'm back to normal.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: In other words, no more kiddie chats with teenagers.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: That's good to know.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: So what about it?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What about what.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Lemme back in ROH. Let's get together, reminisce.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: I don't think so.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Why not? I told you, I'm a changed man.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: It doesn't matter. Your rep is tarnished. We could never get sponsors. Those TNA bastards would boycott all our shows.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: F#$% TNA!

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: We'd be out of business in a month. Sorry Robby.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Dude I thought we were friends.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: "Were" is the key word.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: That's not cool.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I said that's not cool.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Stop trying to be Carlito Colon.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: What do I have to do to change your mind.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Nothing would work. We're over. Get over it. No more ROH for you.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Come on! What will make you take me back.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Time. Lots of it. Stay out of trouble for years, maybe people will forget about it.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hmmm. Time. Okay. I can deal with that.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Okay, I'll call you again later, after enough time has passed.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hello, Gabe? Come on, answer me.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Don't bet on it. All the time in the world can't change what you did.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Let's just try. I'll call you in a few years and see how you feel.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hello.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Can't even answer me, huh. Fine, be like that. Meow. C-YA later.

User FeinsteinIsaWuss has logged off.

At this point, Feinstein signed off. He came back shortly, however, to chat with Gabe some more.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gabe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: WHAT!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Has it been long enough?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: It's been 10 minutes!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Is that all. Well, I stayed out of trouble those 10 minutes.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I want back in ROH.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Please.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gabe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: GO AWAY!!!!!!!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gabe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: You're sick. Go get help.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I don't want help. I want ROH.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: And I want U.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What do you mean you want me.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: You heard me. Dude you know I always liked you.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What the f*ck are you talking about.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: U didn't know?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Know what.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: That I like you. I thought the whole world knew.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What the f*ck. Stop kidding.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: No joke! I want U!

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Oh God.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: This conversation is over.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I want GABE SAPOLSKY.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I want GABE'S MEAT.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hello.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gabe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gae.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I mean, Gabe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hey, that's funny. Gay Gabe. Or Gaybe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Haha, that's a riot.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gaybe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Get lost, freak.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I want U.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: UR hot.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Leave me alone. I'm trying to read my Observer.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Dave Meltzer's hot.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Sick sick sick. You're sick. Get lost.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: But not as hot as U.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I want 2 do something naughty on your goatee.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What the Hell does that mean

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Don't U know.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: No.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: That's where I do something... naughty... all over you.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: That's it. This conversation is over. Goodbye.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: All over U. UR glasses. UR beard. UR chin.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Then I'd fondle your man-boobs.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Like Golddust did to Razor Ramon.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hello.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gaybe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Fine, don't answer. Just listen.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: You, me, and one of your friends makes three.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: After I'm done with U, we'll do a group thang.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: You, me, and the Backseat Boyz.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Who do you think named them that.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: And WHY do you think I named them that.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Use UR imagination Gaybe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: F*ck off.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Send me UR pic.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Do you look the same.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I've been working out, tannin'. I look hot.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: And U look hot.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Knock it off. Samoa Joe just got here.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Oooooooooh! Lemme talk to Joe.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Forget it.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: COME ON!!! Joe's hot.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Not a chance.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Mmmmmm, I wanna take him back 2 the locker room after a 60-minute match and... all that sweat from his tan, gorgeous Samoan body.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: You make me sick.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: ROB.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Yeah baby.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: THIS IS SAMOA JOE. F*CK OFF, YOU HEAR?? YOU'RE A SAD SACK OF SH*T, SITTING AT HOME IM'ING TEENAGE BOYS.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Like U don't?

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: LEAVE GABE ALONE AND DON'T BOTHER US ANYMORE.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I wanna lick your...

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Hey Joe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I'll go 60 minutes with you.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: 2 out of 3 falls, 5 out of 7. Whatever. It's U and it's me, and it's gay with a capital G.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: KEEP IT UP AND I'LL KICK YOUR ASS. I KNOW WHERE U LIVE.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Come over!! U will do many things 2 me, but kicking my ass isn't one of them.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: Dude, just quit. Joe's going ballistic. This is Gabe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Joe, I wanna lick the space behind your knee. I wanna suck UR knees!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: And then I'll nibble on UR shins like I'm playing the harmonica.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Or eating spare ribs.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I'm a dog and I want UR shin bones. Treat me like a bad boy.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: What the Hell is this crazy sh*t you're saying. Joe's not listening to you. And neither am I. Goodbye.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I wanna spread peanut butter on your body and throw pieces of bread at you.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I'm listening to your shoot interviews right now. Mmmmmm, I love your voice when U ask those questions. I'm pleasuring myself to your voice right now.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Damn U sound like U have a you-know-what in UR mouth when U talk. That's hot.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I'm gonna explode!!!!!!!!!!!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Oh yeah, baby.

SapolskyRulesTheWorld: La-la-la, I'm not listening to this, la-la-la...

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Yes you are.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Speaking of shoots, I wanna shoot my... I want YOU.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: AND Samoa Joe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Heck, throw in the new ROH champ, Austin Aries. I'll make him a star.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: He likes it that way.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Or so I'm told.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gaybe, what's a matter. Answer me Gaybe.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Fine, I'll keep going.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: After we do it, we'll shower together.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I have a bench in the shower. U can sit on my lap. The 2 brains of ROH, showering together. DUDE! We could videotape it and sell it!

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "1 Night in Gabe-land" we could call it. Or.... hmm lemme think...

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Ring of Homo"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Gay Shootin'"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Spit Shootin'"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Summer Ram-Slam"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Sperm-diver Series"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "TNA: Total Non-stop Ass."

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "ROH-yal Rumble"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Arma-bed-don"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Spankin' Sapolsky"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "St. Valentine's Ass-acre"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "StarrGabe '69"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Great American Ass"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: "Halloween Have-Lick"

FeinsteinIsaWuss: I know UR there.

FeinsteinIsaWuss: Gaybe?

User SapolskyRulesTheWorld has logged off.

Ugh. Are you nauseous yet? I don't think we should expect Rob Feinstein back in ROH anytime soon.

For those who had to suffer through that, we at The Armpit apologize profusely. If this sick display of hormones means the end of Mr. Feinstein in the wrestling business, then perhaps it all happened for the best.

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