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Ask the Armpit
September 2006
We welcome your comments and questions on the world of pro wrestling, mixed martial arts (MMA), and the Armpit in general. To submit your comments, please use the form on our Contact Us page. --------------
I had a notion a couple of weeks ago, and I
want to share it with someone who can talk wrestling besides myself. I
think this whole ECW resurrection has been in the works for a long, long
time, probably since One Night Stand last year. Lemme explain.
hey i wanted to thank u for putting me in ur letters section , anyway congrats on the anniversary and ur hogan interview i just read - i laughed so hard at " i got there first hulked up , gave them the big boot and covered the indians for the 1 ,2 , 3 - damn that was funny
No name given
Hey prof - for you next Tom Zenk column - Dear Tom - please explain how Diamond Dallas Page who was 38 when WCW went off air 5 years ago in 2001 has just turned 50 acccording to his webpage. Does DDP inhabit a different time space dimension like Hulk Hogan who's still 50 after all these years - and Ric Flair, up space mountain where time stood still at 55.
Name withheld
Armpit: Yeah, I can't wait to turn 50, because apparently birthdays don't count after that.
Man o man...
Armpit: Guess it's time for us to retire.
It said in your latest quiz that you were at the 1993 Royal Rumble "here". That must mean you were in Arco Arena. I'm not sure why I'm writing, but maybe just as one wrestling fan to another I wanted to share my love for that arena. I grew up in California and at the age of 8 moved to Alabama. However, when I visit my family in Cali, I still attend wrestling shows in good ol Sac-Town. My most recent visit was the supershow that featured Batista versus Christian. The first one I can remember was headlined with Roddy Piper, Hogan, Flair and Sid in some form, however I was too little to remember. The moment that stands out the most was the Raw the night after Summerslam 01 and Stephanie McMahone was singing to Stone Cold. It was so annoying and so much fun to boo (along with my 60+ year old Grandpa). Well, I just wanted to state that even in the state of Alabama someone still has appreciation for that arena. Everytime I visit Modesto I fly in to Sacramento and I pass that arena everytime and I smile.
Thank you for your time,
P.S. I know you have a new job and everything, but thank you for keeping the site running. I found a little bit after last summer and have been a fan ever since. Thank you.
Matt Okarmus
That styles clash link (Ask the armpit may
29th) was done on Sterling James
Will Heyman have any real control over the new ECW? Or is he just a figurehead like Teddy Long?
Armpit: Figurehead. With a really, really big forehead.
I just have to say your roast on Stephanie McMahon was hillarious. You gotta do more stuff on her, i mean him. He's such a butterface.
Kevin
Armpit: Doesn't butterface imply the person has a good body???
Hey Professor,
I know Vince and WWE creative get flack over their goofy and lame storylines, i.e. "McMahonism", "JBL disrespecting Eddy's Memory", "Edge-Lita-Matt Hardy triangle", "Kane vs. Old Kane" etc. But even if the stories are stupid, they at least differentiate the wrestlers. The only storyline I kind of remember from TNA was something to do with a video tape that Jackie had or wanted to get, and for some reason Jeff Jarrett could control her because he had the tape? Something like that, and to be honest who really cared? Jackie Gayda was the focus of the storyline, and I am not buying a ticket or a PPV because of Jackie Gayda.
When I watch WWE I know who is wrestling, who is fighting with who, who to root for, who is the heel, who is the face, in short the things needed to hook me into their shows. Granted WWE television has been anything but compelling the past few years, but I still get the ABC's of wrestling with WWE. With TNA I of course know the Old WWE, WCW and ECW guys on the roster, but I couldn't tell you if I was looking at AMW or the Naturals? Team Canada I know because of the Jerseys, but I don't really care about them. Outside of Samoa Joe, Christopher Daniels, and Abyss, the rest of the TNA roster is basically interchangeable. I know there are a bunch of talented guys doing some great wrestling, but I haven't really been given reasons to root for, or more importantly to root against any of them.
Maybe it's because they are limited to one hour, but ECW was a one hour program, and you can't tell me that anyone in TNA has the fan base of Sandman, or like Mike Awesome did back in the day. Booking is as important if not more important than the talent available on the roster. For TNA to be in a legit "war" with WWE they have to step up the booking department and make Impact "must see TV". I just don't see any way TNA can compete in a major way until their weekly TV show tweaks the interest of the casual fan, and they just aren't putting on can't miss TV right now.
Thanks,
I am sure like many fans of 'rasslin' I anticipated the first show for the new ECW to be exciting and naturally, extreme. Unfotunately it lacked ( for the most part ) both of these! I'm pretty forgiving so I'll watch again next week, but I hope they do something quick.
WHAT THE F*CK WAS UP WITH THE ZOMBIE!!!!!
For the love of Joe that was the lamest charecter Ive seen in a long time. Steph must have rented a copy of Resident Evil from Netflix and just gotten it off of her list of movies to watch. And he has no skill on the mic,......... on purpose! If I want to hear dull lethargic groans I'll rent The Addams Family on DVD.
The ECW belt looked cool I guess but Sabu's rib bandages were thicker. It looked like the replica belt for the real belt. I think they probably misplaced the real one,...... yeah that's it ( maybe Shane Douglas was in the stadium and got nostalgic and took the belt and jumped ship to OVW or TNA,.... LOA ).
They need more talent. Rob Van Darn, Big Slow, and Kurt 'Angling for a guest spot on Stargate SG1' are great but they need help. Sabu is,..... well older and has been through too many tables, barb wire ringropes, Russian mine fields and whatever else he could find. He can give them in my humble opinion only a year more of those great high spots before he has to make that transition to high profile jobber. I think they need to go young like TNA. Get an E-X division and lose Dreamer, Sandman, Balls, FBI and all the formers that are past their prime ( not in years but in product value ). A 96 Civic is a nice car but you wouldn't put it on a show floor for a new dealership. My point being that there are too many former champs in such a small stable. Multiple champ this multiple tag champ that.
Push Angle. Push him down the stairs or in traffic if you have too. He is a wrestling demi-god. Keep the red, white, and black. Turn up Big Show's new music when he comes out. I think that's a great remix. Lose the stripper. My Joe she couldn't get her own bra off. She is beautiful though and should be pushed as an interveiwer possibly or a guest announcer. A woman announcer would be extreme, and alot cuter than Mike or Joey! HIYO!!
Anyway enough of the bad. Time for some good. Once again push Angle. That headbutt was ' OFF DA CHAIN'. he can be so dominant and viscious it's scary. And he does belong there just like Benoit and Malenko did back in the nineties.
Big show dominating the extreme battle royal,..... heck the battle royal itself was 'HARD'. Another great Heyman concoction. Have one every week until we get sick of it, which would probably be around 2014. The multiple shots that Show got from about 5 other guys cool and hilarious at the same time. I esspecially enjoyed the way Show displayed his power by tossin everyone except Sabu. The ending was good too Sabu with the steel chairs was a classic touch. Good for him ( he and Flair will be the best over the hill jobbers in history ).
O.K. that's not alot of good but the show was only an hour, which is oddly enough a good touch.
Alright I'm done ranting like Big Poppa Pump in a shoot with DDP ( big ups to the freckled wonder by the way).
Peace to the the W.P.
p.s. Joe is Samoan for "wrestling diety"
Vaughn
Although I've only been reading articles on
your
Hey. Question for ya. I watch WWE every week,
but I'm not in the inside loop Armpit: Vince and HHH wanted Road Dogg and Billy Gunn until they found out those two had said nasty things about them in prior interviews. Waltman may be back, depending on his contract with the MTV promotion. Stranger things have happened, but I'd say No Chance on Chyna. Hall and Nash are being considered to feud with DX, but that is far from definite.
dear armpit,
Armpit: Wrestler contracts are confidential. See my above answer about DX. Jericho will NOT be back in TNA, and not back in WWE anytime soon. Really, it depends how his acting career goes. People are as faithful as their options.
Dear armpit,
Armpit: No, it's not set up. WWE usually offers contracts to the women who don't win anyway.
Hey Prof. Hope your enjoying your vacation.
This link contains the video for
Armpit: YouTube rules.
Armpit: That's an old article. Check the archives for the SD column.
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN,
I WAS JUST ON YOUR WEB SITE AND I AM DEEPLY SAD AT HOW HHH AND EDGE ARE TALKIING ABOUT MARRYING, SLEEPING, AND DIVORCING ALL THE WWE DIVAS LIKE THEY ARE TRASH. THESE TWO MEN ARE A BAD ROLE MODEL FOR THE MANY PEOPLE THAT LOOK UP TO THEM. I CAN'T HOW BAD THESE GUYS ARE TALKING ABOUT ALL THE PRETTY WOMEN IN THE WWE. I AM AMATEUR WOMEN WRESTLER IN THE DALLAS AREA AND I WOULD BE VERY UPSET TO BE TREATED WITH THAT MUCH DISRESPECT. THEY DON'T HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR ANY WOMEN OR EVEN THE HUSBANDS IN THE WWE. I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL FOR WHAT THEY ARE DOING BECAUSE GOD DOES NOT LIKE DIVORCES. THEY WILL GET WHAT THEY DESERVE ONE DAY.
THANK YOU,
KATHY
Armpit: It was a parody.
Hello Professor
Hi there, I came across this amazing, yet blunt piece of critical work.
There are some points where I might consider arguing back, but those are still points that are well taken. However, there is one essential bone of contention that is completely ignored by most of the asinine fans: Christian's look.
I am amongst the few who saw the solid potential in this bad-arses original visage. Unfortunately, most of the fans are just too enamoured in the idea of the impotent clown with the buzz-cut! On the other hand TNA have given this clown a bit of attitude and push, but it's still not quite there. I really think it could work in his favour if he reverted to his old look.
Glad to see someone else take notice. Nice work.
KVS
Hey man, I know how much the Bay Area housing market sucks, but you will reap the benefits of the slow decline eventually. It's actually starting to pick up steam. I'll be impatiently anticipating the return of updates to your site. BTW, wasn't that an awesome move by my boy Umaga on HBK today?
Hope to here from you soon,
Jason Singh "An Armpit Enthusiast"
Hi, Someone I know went to a wedding reception the other night and this guy that was sitting next to her said he was a wrestler. The only thing is I cant find anything about this guy so I dont know if he is a fake or what. He said his name was "Platinum". I am not quite sure if that is how it is supposed to be spelled but could you please email me back asap and let me know if he is a fake or real.
Thank You Andrea
Armpit: Guys will say anything to get laid.
i read your article on the steroid in wwe. i
must say i was surprised at
Armpit: They shrink your balls, not your penis.
Congrats on the best wrestling site ever! I started watching as a kid in the 60's in the Carolina's (Rip Hawk, Johnny Weaver, the Scotts, etc) and in the early 70's moved to Houston and even worked a while for Paul Boesch during an era when he could draw 10K fans a week to the old Sam Houston Coliseum. We had a little promotion in Texas City I worked in setting up the ring, doing announcing and even referred a few nights-best fun ever.
In the ensuing years I've watched with declining interest although recently I've taken some heart via TNA and even some of the ECW. The internet has been a boon for the old memories stuff and I've had a lot of fun corresponding with some of the old times-gys like JJ Dillion and Percy P are very gracious with their time and memories.
Kind of an interesting time and we'll see if the hegemony of WWE can be broken at all-as a business guy I do have to agree with Dixie Carter than when you have an industry with a lot of overlooked talent that has a 900 million dollar market cap and no competition it's worth rolling the dice. The question is whether or not the vision and commitment is there to take the right kind of risks. I would think from what i read on the internet McMahon is leaving a lot of money on the table-just as he taking it from places "wrestling' never could or would have-to his credit.
Great satire and fun interviews-Jesus just keep talking to Zenk! For a guy ialways thought was a stiff he's hella funny-why wasn't he like that on the stick in his career-he'd have been so big nobody could have fired him!
Nice work to all.
DD
Hi. My name is Stratos and I’m fun to WWE. I’m from Greece. I would want to ask you if you can transport a question in THEODORE LONG. The question is: Because I want does lose GREAT KHALI you become you put him it fights with KURT ANGLE or (if it became of course) with STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN? I wait for your answer.
Armpit: Yeah we'll get right on that.
When I went online today, I didn't know what
to expect. Ok, thats not true,
I've been going to your site for a good year
and I must say that I hate
Pedro
Wrestling Profesor- Ill be sad to see you go, and although I havent been watching for too long, (2 years) I still loved your site, so if you do ever decide to restart it, or post articles on myspace, please contact me. again, Im sad to see it go, as I am sure others are feeling the same as me, its your site, and your time.
-Dennis
Well, since this is the last one, I was going
to try and take it... but not keeping up on the US stuff really killed
me here... :)
Dear WP,
Bye. Sad to see you go, but stuff happens.
Soon, maybe by year-end or early 2007, I hope to publish OUT OF TEXAS 2: REMEMBER THE ALOE, MOE. It will consist of a series of spoofs centered round an old Bill Watts type championship tournament, the tournament going on week-by week as the hero participates in a bunch of outside adventures. Naturally I will want to send you a copy. If your site and address are still up, I'll contact you then.
Thanks and take care.
James Hold Missouri City, TX
Just about the only wrestling news site that I read is Wrestleview, due mainly to it's simple look, and no-nonsense reporting. However, not too long ago I started seeing weekly quizzes which were very, very good. The facts were obscure, but not to the point of "where was the WWF house show on June 17th 1993, and what time was opening bell??". I'm sorry to see it go, especially after going a few weeks without having some good trivia. Thanks for the time you've put in, and when you decide to come back I'm sure there will be many, many happy people!
~Neil
hey Mr. Professor this really makes me sad I
can easily remember the first time I stumbled upon your website making
fun of the state of wrestling I used to hate getting up for school on
Monday but looked forward to it Sunday night after I found your site to
see what hilarious things, Jimbo, and others that would write about the
industrys state I remember pretty much pissing my pants laughing at a
few things on the site the Triple HHH Cheating on Stephanie with himself
is my alltime favorite or maybe the Roast of Stephanie Mcmahon ( I just
get a huge kick out of making fun of Steph)
Hey, don't usually write to anyone like this, but just wanted you to know that all your hard work and effort have been appreciated.I've always looked forward to reading, and mentally attempting, your quizzes.Hope someday you make a comeback.
All the best. Matthew
Closing the doors? Sorry to hear that man, unless it means a load is being taken off your back and now you can enjoy some free time! You had a hell of a run.
Derek Burgan
i have been loving your quizzes,and am going to miss them.i guess they say in wrestling,never say never.and definitly,retirement isn't forever,especially when refering to wrestling.various reasons,i have not participated every week,this week included,but enjoyed the hell out of reviewing the qyestions.good luck and thank you for the entertainment.
dave k(gorilla graham)
Aww... I'll miss you guys. Though, I do understand why exactly it must be done. I wish everyone here at The Armpit the best for all their future endeavors.
Before everyone leaves, may I ask one last question. Do you know where Sonjay Dutt got his start in the U.S.? There's a wrestling organization here in Indiana called CCW (Crossroad Championship Wrestling) and they claim that Sonjay got his start there. If you can answer this, I'll definitely appreciate it.
~Jesse Lee
NO. WE NEED THE ARMPIT. YOU CAN'T CLOSE. WE LOVE THIS SITE this is bummer Richard
I'm laughing hard since i read it. I cant
stop thinking about it.
Armpit: He's referring to that guy who writes me seemingly every week with a million questions. Just for fun, let's close out the mailbag by posting some more letters from this person...
hi when is jeff hardy coming back to tna mike HI WHY IS JBL BEEN FORCED TO QUIT MIKE WHY WAS ORLANDO JORDAN RELEASE WHY MIKE
HI THEY SAD THAT MISS JACKIE IS REALLY
PREAGENT IS IT TRUE MIKE HI DO YOU WHERE TERRI GOLD UST EY WIFE IS SHE STILL WRESTLING THESE DAY MIKE where is goldlock these day mike HI WHY DID CHAVO QUIT MIKE I HEARD JR SAY ON TV THAT RICK FLAIR WAS GETTING DEVORCED ,SO HOW CAN HE BE ON HIS HONEY MOON ? HI WHAT UP WITH DLO BOWEN THESE DAY MIKE HI WHERE IS SPIKE DUDLEY THESE DAY MIKE jonh heidenreikn kenzo suzuki luter reigns give me un updates ok mike hi where is xpac these day Ron Harris slash brain lee crowbar daphnia David flair sinn vampire bwo guy mike hi we haven't seen under takers since judges meant day last mouth why what happed to under takers will we every see him again find out mike perry saturn these day new jack justin crebale lace storm francine mike whipwreack sinn slash dusty rhodes harey race stevie ray bookert bothers mike
hello Mr. wrestling will we see stone cold at
ecw one stand this sunday may
hi where chris master these day i dont see
him on raw why where is atrain hi where is the amazing red these day apalo these day sat amazing couison matt benly lance hoty mike HI DO YOU KNOW HOW CRASH HOLLY DEAD hi where is the mnm tag team they where fired frome smack down where are they hi when is hard core holly come back to wwe boogery man mike hi why was Kurt suspends mike how long is rvd suspends hi where is the boogery man where is wwe reffers nick patricks tsynco tomko mike HI I LERANED THAT MARK HERNY IS HURT HIS KNEE IS THAT TURE OR NO MIKE gold ust mat mogan dusty rhodes bob orton jr orlando jordan the dick mike s hi why are home less why hi why did cow boy bob orton jr leaves wwe when is jeff hrady coming back to wwe when is hrad core holly coming how about chris master i heard that trish mighty be leaves wwe to get married to her long time boy friends is that ture what evey happing to bethy phoiny mikey old friends how about the gyminsy where are they mike hi where team 3d why they leaves tna why so why dont we see them i only see spike dudley they sad they where taking time off for what hi where lancy hotly these day mike hi where lod members aminals i dont see him in wwe what about joey mecrus where is he h that all fokes mike chris jerico 3 mintes waring rico nilda billy kidman lance storm goldust brock lesnar do you know how eddie guerreo died how chris benoit rvd that it foley mike new jack danel puders chris jericho billy kid man nilda HI WHEN WILL MARK HENRY BE OUT FOR CHRIS BENOIT TOO I DONT SEE ROB CON WAY THESE DAY MIKE ddp is kevin nASH REALY HURT hi was mikey foley fired last night on raw why HI WAS KURT ANGLES RELEASED hi where is orlando jordan these day
Armpit: That's all folks. Keep in touch guys, and thanks to everyone who wrote in over the years.
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